2/3 painkillers a day, crisps for lunch and drinks at night.
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Does that sound familiar?
Lots of projects, travelling, conference calls at every hour of the day and night to be able to speak to colleagues spread out across different regions and time zones.
My career was flying.
My family was growing.
My payslip was getting heavier.
Airmiles were enough to earn tickets to go back to Italy without paying.
Fast forward 1
Pain killers became a side dish, the main course were frequent attacks of kidney stones and high blood pressure.
But rather than adopting a healthier lifestyle, I was getting used to be taken away from the office on a stretcher by the red cross people.
My mental and physical health deteriorated until
I broke down and brought everyone down with me.
My career and my payslip though were still growing...
but none of that mattered anymore.
Fast forward 2
I started to gave up on all offers to become a bigger shot.
I no longer
- cared about a career
- had a home
- had a life
I was lost
Fast forward 3
In losing my "self" I gained freedom and peace of mind.
I no longer needed a career to affirm myself and still
career wise I kept growing even more
Until... 2nd retrenchment in 2018.
Fast forward 4
I declined offers although being unemployed.
I travelled and wrote a book that has been traditionally published in the Italian version and self published in English.
I no longer have a secured growth path in career terms and
I need to find clients to ensure cash flows keeps coming in.
I no longer seek affirmation.
I no longer need a purpose.
I no longer seek meaning
because
it's all here, right now, in the silent morning walks.
In the eyes of my son.
In the hugs of my partner.
In the busy working days.
In the worries to pay bills when there is no work.
In the heart to heart conversations and
the breathing that I see happening in me with nothing
in my mind, or yours, that I think needs improvement.
Every moment is complete.
We seem to find out what matters after we have exhasuted our illusions first.
All has its place though,
even what I just called illusions, in fact, are what gets us to be free from them.
they show us what we don’t need in order to find out what we truly are.
How does freedom looks and feels like to you?
What if you could access it right now?
It's doable... very doable, right now.
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